Humility

A spiritual path begins with humility.

But what is humility? 

I’ve been thinking about it all day. 

Obviously I “know” what it means, but I cannot put any words to it. I would struggle to define it if someone asked. It seems like a personal response, even though there’s a clear stamped meaning.

If it’s personal, maybe that’s the issue. I don’t know what it means to me.

Caroline Myss says it’s opposite is pride, which is helpful, because I have a lot of pride. 

I struggle to concede any ground. I can dig my heels in the sand so hard. I don’t like being wrong. I want to be taken seriously. I want to be able to anticipate everything that could come my way.

So, personally, humility is letting go of what I think I know to be true. It is learning to accept all that is, just as it is. Learning to accept everyone, just as they are, without expectation or preference. Releasing resentment and frustration when they aren’t met.

Because no one owes me anything, except for me.

Humility then is soft. Quiet. Continued walking along the path, be it seen or unseen, known or unknown, regardless of what is happening along either side of it. 

What I know in my bones - spirit has asked me to write. Maybe this is all just for me. Of course I’d like a guarantee that this will all mean something, that I’ll be recognized, that I’ll prove to everyone I am for real and I’ve got stuff to say. 

But that is where I lose my humility, I leave the path and try to force my way through the trees like I know where I’m going when really I just want to know. 

So humility is doing the work. Putting in the time. Continuing to do all I can to be open to the possibility of what comes next. 

Humility is doing, really doing, what it takes to be of service to this world. 

I know there is something I can offer.

But I must accept that maybe it is a whisper no one hears, a breeze felt but not seen, something unrecognizable. 

A tiny pebble tossed alongside infinite others into a pile that eventually becomes the mountain we all climb to the new world. 

Humility is letting go of I to become we. 

Here, I don’t need to be special, because we are magnificent. At the end of everything, I want to be a part of that.